Thursday, September 24, 2009

Unanswerable Questions

Does anyone know why laundry and dirty dishes seem to self-generate? Do they breed in the dark? Is there something I should be feeding them or should I walk them every day to keep them trim, wet-nosed and shiny-coated?

And why must my daughter have an urgent need for a bathroom when we're halfway home from school -- every day? Could it be something about passing the bus station? or the Library? Is the Post Office a bladder activator?

Is there a reason my husband invariably chooses as his snack something I've prepared for supper? Does he have supper-preparation mind-reading capabilities I know nothing about? Isn't there some kind of E.S.P. disclosure clause in the marriage contract?

And why do I seem completely incapable of saying 'No' when someone from school approaches me with a project? Why am I not earning a paycheck from there?? I spend more time there than anywhere else I can think of. Even Walmart.

Does everyone think their own kids are the cutest in the world? Even when they're barfing or annoying each other or jockeying to be first in line for something? Even when they say things like "he got a bigger scoop of ice cream than I did! No fair!" Because I think that is just *precious.* Okay, not really.

Did I mention the laundry is piling up? And is there a reason why I repeat myself all the time? Could it have something to do with having to ask my kids to put on their shoes 5 times before school?? Did I mention the laundry is piling up?

-sigh-

I guess there are some answers no Mom is meant to discover. Even me. Or maybe especially me.

But if you have a compelling answer to any of these ridiculous questions, I'd love to hear from you. Truly.

In the meantime... did I mention the laundry is piling -- I did?

Oh.


- Midwest Mom

7 comments:

  1. Wow! We have the same problems here. PLEASE let me know if you find a cure. :-)

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  2. You have just penned "Ode to the Houswife/Mother"! Yes, laundry breeds in the night. Yes, kids must pee when put in a vehicle despite anything. Yes, husbands do have the "talent" to scope out exactly the wrong thing to eat, ruining your dinner menu.

    You are not insane. You feel like a parrot repeating yourself because you are! Messes erupt like volcano's, never where you would expect, or when. There are never enough hours in the day because you have kids in your day. It is what it is and this too shall pass. ( I know. It's pithy. )
    Hugs from a Survivor!
    suZen

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  3. That bathroom issue is one we share too--unbelievable. Their bladders are totally triggered by public restroom access. I'm wondering why my countertops can't stay clean. And why the toys won't stay put away.

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  4. sigh...i feel the same way about church...I can't say no to being on another committee or doing another project. I don't care so much about the laundry...I kind of like doing laundry...I just would like to know why my kitchen can be clean one day, and the next day look like a bomb went off in it.

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  5. I hope you aren't trying to do the housework all by yourself on top of working a full time unpaid job! It does pile up quick though, once you have a family you never see the bottom of the hamper again.

    You might try to say something like, "I'm not sure I can commit the amount of time this project needs, I bet (name) would be perfect for it."

    I am with you on the snack/husband thing. Mine will throw things out .. like the bananas I was saving for bread or frozen soup that is still good.

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  6. I found you! I'm gonna poke around a bit!

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  7. PS...I make my kids go naked so there wont be any laundry.

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