Showing posts with label love. Show all posts
Showing posts with label love. Show all posts

Monday, May 4, 2009

My Simple Hopes for Mother's Day

I don't consider myself to be a high-maintenance woman.

And yet...

When it comes to holidays like Mother's day, my uber-intelligent husband is usually stumped.

On the off-chance that he is a regular reader of Midwest Moms, I'm going to make things easy for him this year by listing my simple hopes for the day. And I'll bet dollars to doughnuts the price tag at the end will be within reach.

On Mother's Day, I want...

  • My husband to be the one who gets up and showers early so that he can help the children get dressed for church. I also want the luxury of an extra five minutes of silence in the shower, and of choosing only my own church clothes, not everyone else's.

  • To get family obligations (i.e. any visit or gift-giving or phone calls to my Mom or his Mom) done before noon. Afternoon and evening belong to me. I am hereby claiming them.

  • Home-made drawings from my children. Honestly, they are the best gifts the kids can give me, and I will never tire of getting them. Hallmark and American Greetings have absolutely nothing that will out-do my kids. (And I save every drawing, so you know I must love them!)

  • Time outdoors. If it's good weather, I want to be outside. So, if you're planning, plan to be out. (Hint: pack a bag with essentials, like sunscreen and drinks... It's what I would do.)

  • A clean kitchen at the end of the day (that I didn't clean!) I don't care if we eat every meal and snack out for the entire day or if we just use paper plates and napkins all day. I just don't want to wash a single dish on Mother's day -- or have a pile of them waiting for the day after.

  • A letter from the man I love. It doesn't have to be the great American novel, but it does have to help me feel appreciated for all the things I love to do for our family.

That's it. Pretty simple. I don't require diamonds or roses or a trip to Europe (although, if you're planning that, super!) I just want an easy day with my family with a few of the usual burdens lifted from my shoulders.

Now, isn't that easy?

- Midwest Mom

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

Little, Nameless, Unremembered Acts

Life can surprise you with truth every so often.
Today Wordsworth speaks to me.
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Lines Written A Few Miles above Tintern Abbey

Five years have passed; five summers, with the length
Of five long winters! and again I hear
These waters, rolling from their mountain-springs
With a sweet inland murmur. Once again
Do I behold these steep and lofty cliffs,
Which on a wild secluded scene impress
Thoughts of more deep seclusion; and connect
The river is not affected by the tides a few miles above Tintern.

The landscape with the quiet of the sky.
The day is come when I again repose
Here, under this dark sycamore, and view
These plots of cottage-ground, these orchard-tufts,
Which, at this season, with their unripe fruits,
Among the woods and copses lose themselves,
Nor, with their green and simple hue, disturb
The wild green landscape. Once again I see
These hedge-rows, hardly hedge-rows, little lines
Of sportive wood run wild; these pastoral farms
Green to the very door; and wreathes of smoke
Sent up, in silence, from among the trees,
With some uncertain notice, as might seem,
Of vagrant dwellers in the houseless woods,
Or of some hermit's cave, where by his fire
The hermit sits alone.
Though absent long,
These forms of beauty have not been to me,

As is a landscape to a blind man's eye:
But oft, in lonely rooms, and mid the din
Of towns and cities, I have owed to them,
In hours of weariness, sensations sweet,
Felt in the blood, and felt along the heart,
And passing even into my purer mind
With tranquil restoration: -- feelings too
Of unremembered pleasure; such, perhaps,
As may have had no trivial influence
On that best portion of a good man's life;
His little, nameless, unremembered acts
Of kindness and of love. Nor less, I trust,
To them I may have owed another gift,
Of aspect more sublime; that blessed mood,
In which the burthen of the mystery,
In which the heavy and the weary weight
Of all this unintelligible world
Is lighten'd -- that serene and blessed mood,
In which the affections gently lead us on,

Until, the breath of this corporeal frame,
And even the motion of our human blood
Almost suspended, we are laid asleep
In body, and become a living soul:
While with an eye made quiet by the power
Of harmony, and the deep power of joy,
We see into the life of things. If this
Be but a vain belief, yet, oh! how oft,
In darkness, and amid the many shapes
Of joyless day-lights; when the fretful stir
Unprofitable, and the fever of the world,
Have hung upon the beatings of my heart,
How oft, in spirit, have I turned to thee
O sylvan Wye! Thou wanderer through the wood
How often has my spirit turned to thee!

And now, with gleams of half-extinguished thought,
With many recognitions dim and faint,
And somewhat of a sad perplexity,
The picture of the mind revives again:
While here I stand, not only with the sense
Of present pleasure, but with pleasing thoughts
That in this moment there is life and food
For future years. And so I dare to hope
Though changed, no doubt, from what I was, when first
I came among these hills; when like a roe
I bounded o'er the mountains, by the sides
Of the deep rivers, and the lonely streams,
Wherever nature led; more like a man
Flying from something that he dreads, than one
Who sought the thing he loved. For nature then
(The coarser pleasures of my boyish days,
And their glad animal movements all gone by,)
To me was all in all. -- I cannot paint

What then I was, The sounding cataract
Haunted me like a passion: the tall rock,
The mountain, and the deep and gloomy wood,
Their colours and their forms, were then to me
An appetite: a feeling and a love,
That had no need of a remoter charm,
By thought supplied, or any interest
Unborrowed from the eye. -- That time is past,
And all its aching joys are now no more,
And all its dizzy raptures. Not for this
Faint I, nor mourn nor murmur: other gifts
Have followed, for such loss, I would believe,
Abundant recompence. For I have learned
To look on nature, not as in the hour
Of thoughtless youth, but hearing oftentimes
The still, sad music of humanity,
Not harsh or grating, though of ample power

To chasten and subdue. And I have felt
A presence that disturbs me with the joy
Of elevated thoughts; a sense sublime
Of something far more deeply interfused,
Whose dwelling is the light of setting suns,
And the round ocean, and the living air,
And the blue sky, and in the mind of man,
A motion and a spirit, that impels
All thinking things, all objects of all thought,
And rolls through all things. Therefore am I still
A lover of the meadows and the woods,
And mountains; and of all that we behold
From this green earth; of all the mighty world
Of eye and ear, both what they half-create,
This line has a close resemblance to an admirable line of Young,
the exact expression of which I cannot recollect.

And what perceive; well pleased to recognize
In nature and the language of the sense,
The anchor of my purest thoughts, the nurse,
The guide, the guardian of my heart, and soul
Of all my moral being.

Nor, perchance,
If I were not thus taught, Should I the more
Suffer my genial spirits to decay:
For thou art with me, here, upon the banks
Of this fair river; thou, my dearest Friend,
My dear, dear Friend, and in thy voice I catch
The language of my former heart, and read
My former pleasures in the shooting lights
Of thy wild eyes. Oh! yet a little while
May I behold in thee what I was once,
My dear, dear Sister! And this prayer I make,
Knowing that Nature never did betray

The heart that loved her; 'tis her privilege,
Through all the years of this our life, to lead
From joy to joy: for she can so inform
The mind that is within us, so impress
With quietness and beauty, and so feed
With lofty thoughts, that neither evil tongues,
Rash judgments, nor the sneers of selfish men,
Nor greetings where no kindness is, nor all
The dreary intercourse of daily life,
Shall e'er prevail against us, or disturb
Our chearful faith that all which we behold
Is full of blessings. Therefore let the moon
Shine on thee in thy solitary walk;
And let the misty mountain winds be free
To blow against thee: and in after years,
When these wild ecstasies shall be matured
Into a sober pleasure, when thy mind
Shall be a mansion for all lovely forms,
Thy memory be as a dwelling-place

For all sweet sounds and harmonies; Oh! then,
If solitude, or fear, or pain, or grief,
Should be thy portion, with what healing thoughts
Of tender joy wilt thou remember me,
And these my exhortations! Nor, perchance,
If I should be, where I no more can hear
Thy voice, nor catch from thy wild eyes these gleams
Of past existence, wilt thou then forget
That on the banks of this delightful stream
We stood together; And that I, so long
A worshipper of Nature, hither came,
Unwearied in that service: rather say
With warmer love, oh! with far deeper zeal
Of holier love. Now wilt thou then forget,
That after many wanderings, many years
Of absence, these steep woods and lofty cliffs,
And this green pastoral landscape, were to me
More dear, both for themselves, and for thy sake.

~William Wordsworth

Friday, February 27, 2009

Tag! You're It!

Kids Games to Keep you Fit and More

One of my favorite ways to stay active is to play games with my children. I have three between the ages of 3 and 7, and they are running around constantly. The more they run, the more they seem to want company -- "Mommy, Daddy, come play with me!"

It's music to my ears, really.

For today's Fit Mommy Friday tip, I give you another no-brainer. Try to channel your inner kindergartner and play outdoor games with your children. Here are a few to try.

Tag and Freeze Tag: One of the best ways to get running with your kids is to chase them or be chased. In the game of tag, one player is "it". He chases the other players trying to touch them. As soon as he catches one, the caught person becomes "it." In freeze tag, the tagger touches people to freeze them. Tagged players must stand perfectly still. They can only be unfrozen by another player crawling through their legs or running in a circle around them. The goal is to "freeze" all the players but one. Whoever is the last person left unfrozen becomes "it."

Blast Off: This is a great game to play with a playground ball and lots of room to run. The person with the ball gets ready to throw it while the other players stand in a circle around her. Everybody counts: 5-4-3-2-1, Blast off! She throws the ball as high as she can straight up into the air and calls out a name of one of the players. Everyone but the person whose name was called runs as far away as they can get. The child whose name was called tries to catch the ball. If they do: they automatically win. If not, they get it and call out, "1-2-3 STOP!" Everybody freezes. The person with the ball then has five giant steps toward the closest person. If they can throw the ball and hit that person, they get to be in the middle and the ball gets thrown up in the air again. If they can't, they are out. The last person remaining wins.

Monkey Races: We play this game at the playground. Essentially, it is an obstacle course race on the playground equipment. We call it monkey races because it always starts with a side-by-side race on the monkey bars. What a workout for Mommy! (I don't mind telling you that I usually lose to my 7 year old.) Set up the course, ready, set, go! There's nothing like winning to make any game irresistible.

******************************

And now, for a different sort of Tag -- one that doesn't work up quite as much of a sweat!

My bloggy friend Melissa at Green Girl in Wisconsin tagged me the other day to participate in a meme called "Love Me, Love Me Not". I have to list 5 things I love about myself and 5 things that aren't so lovable about me. (Trust me, my husband had a ball "helping" me figure out what to write! Who knew he loved it when I let my hair dry naturally? Who also knew that he notices how grumpy I am before my a.m. coffee infusion?) Then, I have to "tag" 5 bloggers to play the game next.

Because I like to end on a positive note, I'll start with the 5 things I don't love about myself.

1. I am a worrier. I worry about my children and my parents, about their health and their futures. I worry about the country because I want us to finally have our priorities right. (Lately, I worry about that a lot less.) I worry that I'm not doing enough for everyone else. I worry that I will fail. Worrying is something I try to turn into positive action, to use it rather than succumbing to it. But in my heart, I know I will never be entirely free of it.

2. On a lighter note, I am far too ticklish -- physically ticklish. It is a terrible weakness because it means that my children (or my husband) can completely immobilize me at a moments notice. It has all but dashed my dreams of ever becoming a ninja. Ninjas can't be ticklish. But I totally am -- virtually everywhere.

3. I am risk averse. There is always this voice in my head that is telling me all the ways something could hurt before I do it. I often wish I could just turn that voice off instead of always having to overcome it or act in spite of it. My risk-averse nature comes out in my parenting; I know my children will tease me later in life for the number of times the words "be careful" came out of my mouth.

4. In the mornings especially, I am hopelessly grouchy. And when I say grouchy, I mean terse and crabby. My three-year old daughter calls my hairspray "grouch spray". (That disarms me right away, for sure!) Fortunately, my grouchiness is easily overcome by the caring look on her face when she asks if I'm feeling grumpy today -- and coffee... plenty of coffee.

5. I cannot eat anything I want. Trust me. I so totally wish I could, but I have always had to watch my weight and curb my appetites. Life has had a way of throwing that little foible in my face by making me fall in love with the one man who could eat pancakes and bacon for every breakfast, fries at every lunch, and cheesecake for dessert every day and never gain an ounce. He is metabolic perfection. I, sadly, am not.

Okay. Now, for the fun part! What I truly love about myself.

1. My teeth. I have always had straight teeth -- I get them from my mother. I've never had to wear braces, and was cavity-free until I was about 17 years old. Even then, I only had a pit in one tooth. My older sister had to go through a variety of face-altering devices so that she could look more like a human and less like a shark. Growing up, I tried not to gloat over my perfectly straight teeth. But as she moaned in the night from the pain of the medieval torture devices she was forced to wear by sadists we call "orthodontists", I secretly thanked the Lord Above for giving me a mouthful of dental perfection.

2. I have an abiding, honest-to-goodness L. O. V. E. of sports. I love to play them. I love to watch them. I love to talk about them. A side-benefit of loving sports is that my husband's friends have openly labeled me as being pretty darn close to the Ideal Mate. When we were dating, we went to a party for the Michigan-Ohio State game. After a great play, I noted that the guys on SportsCenter had been talking about the player involved. Hubby's friends looked at each other as though their world had been fundamentally altered. "You watch SportsCenter?!??!" they exclaimed with incredulity. Then, to Hubby, "She's a keeper." If my love of sports put me in the "keeper" category and makes me happy, anyway, it should definitely be on this list.

3. I love my sense of humor and my willingness to poke fun at myself at least as often as I poke fun at other people. Laughing is good therapy -- so is laughing at yourself. I would not change my sense of humor. It's one of the essential parts of me.

4. I love that I have a green thumb. There is something profound and powerful about being able to help the earth bear fruit. It is a gift I am grateful for because it nourishes me as much as I nourish it.

5. Finally, I love having an open heart. There are few people on this planet that I have no use for or that I believe are beyond hope. It is a wonderful feeling not to judge my fellow human beings, but to simply appreciate them and care for them. I have often said to friends and family members who have been hurt that, for me, one of the surest ways to know God is through the act of loving again. I have always tried to let love guide my decision-making. It hasn't steered me wrong yet.

And now, (drumroll please) for the five fantastic bloggers I hope will carry forward this fun game of Tag...

1. Laurie Rodak at The Playground Observer
2. Susana at Firefly Shop - My Thoughts
3. Suzen at Erasing the Bored
4. Julie at Octamom
and
5. Abby at My Sweet Babboo


Have a great weekend, everyone!

- Midwest Mom

Thursday, February 12, 2009

Bargain Valentine Dos and Don'ts

Let's face it; most of us aren't spending a lot these days. That can be a problem when it comes to "conscious splurge" holidays like Valentine's Day.

"Romance on a Budget" might not be in your comfort zone. Heck, you may never have even put those words together in the same sentence. (For instance, most husbands might avoid the first word in favor of the second... and most paperback novels feature a man who thinks only of sweeping a girl off her feet, never worrying about the bill.)

Life just isn't fair. But I digress... Instead of grumbling, it seems like a good time for


Bargain Valentine Dos and Don'ts!

To save money and have a romantic Valentine's Day,

DO spend time cooking some heart-and-soul-warming comfort food together instead of going out to an expensive restaurant.

DON'T order in two dozen buffalo wings because what could be hotter than hot sauce on your partner's face? (The breath is an added bonus.)


DO go to an auction together to buy your spouse something beautiful without breaking the bank.

DON'T bemoan the prices at the jewelry store and use them as an excuse to get her nothing at all.


DO take a long, quiet walk together at a local park, followed by warm cocoa at the coffee shop just like you did when you were dating.

DON'T suggest a walk, but bring along the kids and make the playground your destination. (Trust me, ask Grandma to watch the kids for an hour. She will say yes.)


DO bring your wife an inexpensive bottle of wine and a single red rose.

DON'T buy flowers because you feel you have to, spend too much, and then "confess" the price to your wife as you apologize for the fact that the flowers are wilting on the first day.


DO write a note telling your spouse how much you appreciate what they do for you each and every day. Let your partner know one thing that happened in the past year that proves you are perfectly matched.

DON'T write your message in one of those cards with a bikini girl inside or a picture of a chimp. No matter what you write or how cheap the card was, the romance value is zero.


DO assemble photos of your spouse from high school or college, from when you were dating and first married, from when you first had children, from that last romantic vacation, from today, and let your spouse know that he or she has only grown more and more beautiful as time has gone by.

DON'T look at a beautiful woman or handsome man that walks by and say, "I remember when you looked that good." It's not the same thing. Trust me.


DO turn out the lights, light the fireplace and candles, and talk about the day you first met. Laugh together and remember why you are together.

DON'T turn out the lights, roll over, and start to snore.


I hope you and your special someone have a wonderfully romantic Valentine's day.

And if it doesn't turn out like a paperback novel, at least have a good laugh about it -- it's a great coping mechanism. Right?

- Midwest Mom

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Easy Valentine Fun: Tissue Paper Flowers

My children and I sat down today to make some special surprises for our relatives who live far away.


We made tons and tons of tissue paper flowers.

Tomorrow I will box them up and send them off to brighten the Valentines Day of our Grandparents and Godparents, Great Uncles and Aunts and even one Great Grandparent! They were so easy to make and such fun that I thought I would share.



You will need:

Scissors

Tissue Paper in many colors (I save mine from gift bags!)

Pipe cleaners at least 12 inches long

Heart-shaped paper doilies


Instructions:

1. Cut the tissue paper into rectangles about 6 in. wide by 8 inches long.

2. Carefully stack the sheets on top of one another so that the edges line up.

3. Starting from the short side, fold the stack like an accordion or fan.



4. Twist a pipe cleaner around the middle of the flower 1 1/2 times, or until it holds securely.

5. Starting with the top sheet of tissue, gently pull it up and toward the center of the flower, separating it from the rest of the stack. Repeat with the other layers, being careful not to tear the paper.

6. Write your valentine greeting on the center of a paper doily. Cut a slit in the top and bottom of the heart and thread the flower stem through.


I took a picture of my crew with their garden of paper flowers and used it to create homemade Valentine cards to send with the flowers.



I can't wait to hear how our loved ones like them. We are so blessed to have many generations of our family still living. I want them to know that they are a treasured part of our family.

It's wonderful that a holiday like Valentines Day gives us the chance to do just that.

- Midwest Mom

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

It's Time To Reach Out

People in the news talk about unemployment numbers as though they were just numbers. They're not. They're people without jobs.

My husband works for an automotive supplier, and last week he came home every day talking about who was heading home for the last time.

I didn't let on, but I dreaded the conversation we would have every evening. Early in the week, he told me a few people were "let go" with a sense of half-relief. "They usually make all the cuts in one day," he said. But the next day there were more cuts and more and more. By the end of the week, we found ourselves talking about financial strategy.

It was and is nerve-wracking.

Today, the President came out and said that the economy may worsen before it gets better. That may be true, but I can feel my hair going grey and those pesky worry lines on my forehead getting deeper. When I opened this morning's news paper, I saw that John Deere announced they're cutting jobs in Iowa. Caterpillar is cutting jobs in Illinois. I won't even talk about Michigan. The evening news held announcements of job cuts at Home Depot, Nextel, Spring, Pfizer. Every state is being hit -- hard.

During the past year, we have trimmed our household budget down to bare bones, or so I thought before last week. Now, when I think about how we could survive job loss, if that were to happen, I know that we could have to cut much more. All over this country, men and women are having to make choices about whether to buy food or keep warm, whether to get a doctor's care or fix the car, whether to pay their house payment or their credit card bill. There is no doubt about it; we are in a rough place as a country.

The question is, what do we do about it?

During times like these, when I feel my sense of worry deepen, just about the only way I can find comfort is by reaching out. Last week, we went through all our clothing to donate warm snowsuits, jackets, sweaters, and boots to our local family clothing ministry. My boys are participating in a food drive through school to help keep our local food pantry stocked. We have set aside furniture to donate to the YWCA shelter for abused women. I know it's not much, but it is something.

When I think about how bad the economy is and how bad it may become, I think about how our grandparents' generation made it through the depression. I think about how my own parents made it through tough economic times, even with 6 children.

They made it through by counting on each other.

People make the difference in difficult times. Neighbors help to fix a car. Sisters help to share food or babysit. Friends offer a shoulder to cry on or a listening ear. Strangers donate food or clothing or transportation to the doctor.

And so I tell myself, no matter how worried I am about the future, I have a loving family. I have caring neighbors. I have friends at church and school. I have faith.

I take a deep breath and despite my worry I tell myself, We will be okay.

And then I look around to see who I can help. Please, I truly hope you do, too. In our lifetime, there has never been a more important time to pitch in.

Maybe if we all do, these troubled times might become a little bit easier.

- Midwest Mom